Wednesday, March 08, 2006

Green eggs and ham

A Dr. Suess' prescription for a day of abnormal craziness. We feel today is about as nonsensical as Dr. Suess:
"I do not like them in a box.
I do not like them with a fox.
I do not like them in a house.
I do not like them with a mouse.
I do not like them here or there.
I do not like them anywhere.
I do not like gren eggs and ham.
I do not like them, Sam-I-am.
If green eggs are real, then I must believe the Santa Fe apparition in my front yard is real. Can one possess a car for three weeks, yet not really own it? The dilemma remains, as the mysterious check keeps eluding us from Capitol One. Their customer service is about as helpful as that fox with scripts such as "Sir, I can send you a new check". This was there answer to every question today. Yesterday it was "We sent you a new check, but it isn't valid" or "We cannot send you a new check" or "We will send you a new check". Which is it?
What is the doctor's prescription for me today? The green eggs bit first. I spent the morning testing at the hospital playing adult games like "What items are missing from the food tray?" and "What is wrong with this safety picture?". I am not sure why they tested me at all-- if you can't tell that two people walking blindly into one another around a corner is a safety hazard, something must be wrong with you.
In the house and in the box, the chickens are keeping their own time, pestering one another like a crowd of selfish children. Travis is the official chicken charmer-- he'll pet them in his hands and they'll fall asleep.
Outside the house, the sun and clouds are fighting in our southern sky here today. We have huge high dark clouds in the sky with a forecast of rain. Not a promise easily believed. Our percentages of rain are around 10%. Yet, we remain hopeful.
As for the mouse-- the mouse came in the form of a phone call. I had call from my own mobile telephone contract trying to sell me the same contract I already have? Not only that, but from India? Strange, but I had to ask the mouse why he needed my name again if he already knew it because he worked for Cingular. Sound a little sneaky? Especially when my name is not Michael.
Green eggs-- no ham, just the eggs. If you think green eggs don't exist, then you haven't seen mine. They are from Aracuana hens which lay pale green eggs instead of brown or white. They are in the cookies I just made... why don't you drop by to try some green eggs and ham. You might end up doing what Sam did:
Say!I like green eggs and ham!I do! I like them, Sam-I-am!

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